I'm going to

write a book.

For a friend

These are not my words.  But, they're worth sharing and I think someone needs to hear them.

"God, investigate my life; get all the facts firsthand. 
   I'm an open book to you; 
      even from a distance, you know what I'm thinking. 
   You know when I leave and when I get back; 
      I'm never out of your sight. 
   You know everything I'm going to say 
      before I start the first sentence. 
   I look behind me and you're there, 
      then up ahead and you're there, too— 
      your reassuring presence, coming and going. 
   This is too much, too wonderful— 
      I can't take it all in! 

 Is there anyplace I can go to avoid your Spirit? 
      to be out of your sight? 
   If I climb to the sky, you're there! 
      If I go underground, you're there! 
   If I flew on morning's wings 
      to the far western horizon, 
   You'd find me in a minute— 
      you're already there waiting! 
   Then I said to myself, "Oh, he even sees me in the dark! 
      At night I'm immersed in the light!" 
   It's a fact: darkness isn't dark to you; 
      night and day, darkness and light, they're all the same to you. 

 Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; 
      you formed me in my mother's womb. 
   I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking! 
      Body and soul, I am marvelously made! 
      I worship in adoration—what a creation! 
   You know me inside and out, 
      you know every bone in my body; 
   You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, 
      how I was sculpted from nothing into something. 
   Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; 
      all the stages of my life were spread out before you, 
   The days of my life all prepared 
      before I'd even lived one day. 

 Your thoughts—how rare, how beautiful! 
      God, I'll never comprehend them! 
   I couldn't even begin to count them— 
      any more than I could count the sand of the sea. 
   Oh, let me rise in the morning and live always with you! 
  
   Investigate my life, O God, 
      find out everything about me; 
   Cross-examine and test me, 
      get a clear picture of what I'm about; 
   See for yourself whether I've done anything wrong— 
      then guide me on the road to eternal life."

~Psalm 139 - The Message

Oh, I forgot...

... N's been released from the hospital and he started back up at school on Tuesday!  Still trying to see how much he recalls academically.  He's walking fine, and talking, but a lot slower.  Has short term memory loss (trouble remembering info after 5 minutes). New behavior and huge prayer request - very, very violent (especially in what he says), and not just when he's angry or in a tantrum. Needs PT, OT, and Speech. Perhaps will be enrolled in residential treatment, but that's on hold for now. I will no longer be working with him, which, while I want to see him, am not complaining about that.  

Thank you all for your prayers! He's a fighter and the Lord isn't done with him yet!!

Hi

You're walking down the hall of your workplace and there is another employee (whose name and job you don't know) walking towards you.  As you pass her, you cheerfully exclaim "Hi! How are you today?", making solid eye contact and presenting a wide smile.  She, in turn, stops walking and you two share a brief, but meaningful conversation before continuing on.  Right? Yeah, right.

When was the last time you actually made eye contact when passing someone you don't really know?  Better yet, when was the last time you actually said "hi" to someone sharing the common walkway?  A more realistic depiction of the above scenario would involve looking at the floor, or perhaps scratching your head or fixing your hair as you pass, anything to avoid an social exchange with  a person you don't know.  I know I'm culprit of this.  I hate to admit it, but sometimes at the store or on the sidewalk, I'll be rude enough to pull out my phone and pretend to make a call so I don't have to look up or talk.  How rude.

I'm reading this book right now called The Love Dare.  The book is actually a 40-day devotional encouraging you to love your spouse better, giving challenges each day regarding how you treat your spouse.  Yesterday's excerpt was all about greeting your spouse.  You can say a lot simply in the tone of your voice when someone you love walks in the door, and it most definitely affects the mood if you choose to look up.  This caused me to think about how we greet others in general.  I know that I myself have work to do when it comes to being friendly and reaching out to others.  I can't help but think how disappointed Jesus would be if he saw that those who claim to follow Him ignore their neighbor.  

Do a little experiment... attempt to make eye contact with each person you pass next time you go out of the house.  Count how many don't look up.  Regardless of the other person's actions, say "hi" and see what happens.  Count how many look surprised, how many look appreciative, and how many smile.  It's quite amazing what a simple "hi" can do.

It's the Little Things...

...in life that make it worth living! :) 

• laughing so hard that you absolutely have to let out a deep sigh when you're through, only to discover that you can't remember what you were laughing about.
• sitting by a fire with a blanket and a cup of fresh coffee (french pressed with cream and raw sugar of course).
• receiving open-mouthed kisses from toddlers who can't yet say "I love you" or "I just gave the dog a kiss and would now like to do the same for you".
• listening to the unstoppable giggle of children.
• a really good hug (defined by one person's feet leaving the ground and both people spinning)
• praying a quick, honestly mindless prayer and having it answered within seconds.
• breakfast in bed.
• doing something nice for someone else (such as cleaning the kitchen first or sending a box of peanut butter bon-bons).
• peaceful snow - the kind that just falls, (not the stuff that blows sideways and accumulates in a matter of minutes, causing a month-and-a-half of chaos in one city).
• hearing from someone who had just crossed your mind.
• puppies.
• jumping in really big puddles (although only truly satisfying when done with a friend)
• pondering how things are made (really... think about it).
• completing a puzzle.
• hearing the exact-right lyrics to describe life at the moment.
• watching kids have epiphanies.
• putting on a new pair of warm, cushy socks.

The list could go on and on, but this is what is on my mind at the moment.  Thank you, Lord, for the little luxuries in life that make me smile!

Friends

So I have a small confession... I've been watching "Friends" in ALL my free time!  Yes, I come home from work, grab a cup of coffee and a blanket, and watch "Friends".  I've made it through Season 6, although I'd already seen Season 5 and I've seen the last two seasons as well.  

Anyway, so "Friends" is full of mindless/fairly crude humor, semi/mostly shallow friendships.  And while I've enjoyed watching it, it's made me really thankful for my own friends.  One common theme I've noticed is that all their conflicts are caused by someone's selfishness.  By human nature, we usually have our own best interest in mind.  If something is not going the way we want it to, we're really good at tearing others apart to make us seem in the right.  If you don't believe me, "Friends" really is the prime example of this.  

I know that I've had my fair share of ripping up my friends, doing certain things out of my own selfish desires, and hurting people simply to deny the fact that I'm wrong about something.  And for those of you who have received the brunt of that, I apologize.  I am thankful, however, that I'm not a hopeless case... none of us are.

Jesus came to the world and he turned it upside down.  He was an outright rebel.  Nothing he did reflected human nature's greedy selfishness.  He came to serve other people, even though he is the only one worthy of service.  When others hurt him, insulted him, doubted him (including his closest friends), he simply forgave them, loved them, and served them all the more.  And then, well, he died because of all our selfishness we who want to look right in the eyes of others.  But the best part of it all is that he came to life again that we might be forgiven of all our betrayal.  So, what more can we do but follow his example and live a selfless life?  

This is why I'm thankful for my friends... those who have forgiven me, those who teach me the love of Christ, and those who challenge me to love unconditionally.  And, I'm thankful for the laughs I get from "Friends", and the wonderful reminder it is to me that I am to cherish others and build them up, rather than discourage and hurt them with my words and actions.  

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility, consider others better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.  Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking on the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.  And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient to death - even death on a cross." - Philippians 3:3-8

Wanting

It's funny to me how we always seem to want what we can't have.  And, to add to the irony, we never seem to realize we want it until it's out of reach or off-limits.  For example,  what a wonderful concept Christmas Break is!  I get two weeks of sleeping in (still working in the afternoons), and will have a four day weekend when Christmas rolls around later this week.  My Christmas Break started early, as school was cancelled the last two days of my previous week.  That said, I've been relaxing at home with my husband (who was also unable to get to work) for the past 5 days.  

Yes, it all sounds wonderful doesn't it?  Yet this morning I woke up PRAYING that I could go to work today!  All I've done the past two weeks is said "Oh, I can't wait for Christmas break!" and then it comes, and you know what I want? To go back to work!  Doesn't our God have immense patience?! And what do you know, I couldn't go to work today... No, the snow plower seemed to have thought it a good idea to plow our parking lot and pile up all the snow behind the parked cars.  While humorous, it prevented me yet again from having what I want.  

But you see, tomorrow, when I go to work from 8-5 or so, I'm going to complain and say all I want to do is be at home next to the Christmas tree with my cup of coffee and my book, as I've done for the past 5 days.  The grass is always greener, is it not?

So, my challenge to myself today and for this week, especially in light of the Christmas time, I want to be content and grateful for the things, people, and situations God has given me.  Who am I to ask for more/different when I am loved, warm, and well-cared for... not to mention saved for all eternity!  

In the words of St. Francis of Assisi:

"O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

to be understood as to understand;

to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life."