Perfection

There is something to be said for doing things well.  I have always been somewhat of a perfectionist, a trait which I acquired from my father.  With a background in psychology, I of course spend a lot of time debating whether the acquisition of this trait was based upon the nature of my genetics or the method of nurturing I experienced.  That, however, is a discussion (not a debate), for another day.

All through school, home, and the general human society, we are taught to put forth our best effort, doing all things the best that we can.  The Bible even tell us, "whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord..." (Colossians 3:23).  This, of course, is a virtue that I agree with and that I strive to achieve.  But, I can't help but think that we put too much emphasis on perfection itself.  It drives fathers to be workaholics, mothers to be plastic, children to be deceptive, youth to be anorexic and addicted, and many to be suicidal.  

I myself have experienced the feeling of utter failure, particularly this week.  Sometimes it's the little things in life that I expect to do perfectly that drive me to destruction.  For example, let's take Spike.  If you've been reading my previous posts, you know I raised a sourdough starter... we named him Spike.  Well, Spike failed.  On two different attempts this week, I tried to make some sourdough bread with Spike (two different recipes), both to no avail.  As I've been spending a lot of my time reading various homemaking and cooking blogs, as well as researching natural living and attempting to put all these methods in practice,  I figured that success should follow in-turn.  Unfortunately, that's not how it worked out.  I ended with three dense loaves of rock, a dinner which my husband disliked, and a whole bunch of dirty dishes, that ended up being washed twice.  Let's just say, I was a wreck, made myself sick, and missed a day of work.  I don't know that all this week's home failures are what led me to illness, but I wouldn't put it past God to force me to my end's wit to trust him. :)

This is just something small.  I realized this week that perfection is not everything.  David, who I have been reading about in 2 Samuel for quite some time, was far from perfect.  But do you know what?  The Lord himself called him "a man after God's own heart".  Wow.  With that, nothing else matters.  My goal in life should not be perfectionism, but should instead be complete unity with My Lord and Savior.  

I'm not saying that I get to throw perfection out the door right away, because I know that's not possible for me... Perfect is part of who I am.  But, I can leave some room for mistakes (which are the best teaching manipulative!), and know that God desires nothing more than for me to run into His presence and seek His heart.